How I stopped getting laid

Sex is great, but masturbation is often even better. It’s easily available and can make you feel great.

Why sex is important

Sex is one of our basic needs. It doesn’t matter if you’re doing it to reproduce or have fun — most of us are still doing it. However, when we talk about sex, we usually mean sex with a partner.

Partnered sex isn’t wrong at all, but it overshadows another important kind of sex — the solo kind. Self-stimulation is a fun way of having sex regardless of whether you have a partner. It’s a great way to get to know yourself and explore what makes you feel good.

Let’s be realistic — you don’t need a partner to achieve anything in life. The same applies to having good sex and orgasms. So let’s bring more awareness to how you can have great sex on your own.

You don’t need a partner

Having a partner has its benefits. They’re there to support you, teach you things, and provide good sex, among other things. However, you don’t need a partner to have any of these things.

Many people are afraid to go solo because maybe they have never experienced an orgasm on their own. When you know what it feels like, you won’t want to stop. Orgasms are highly achievable during solo play. In fact, you’re more likely to reach them when you’re playing on your own.

Why is that the case? Masturbation is a great way of getting to know yourself. You’re exploring your fantasies, figuring out what turns you on, maybe even pushing your boundaries. You won’t have to waste time finding out what your partner is into. This time, it’s all about you, your wants, and your needs.

This doesn’t mean you should give up partnered sex forever. Masturbation as a means of self-discovery is essential for sex with others as well. Once you figure out what works for you, you’re able to communicate it effectively and focus on getting to know your partner too.

Masturbation and its benefits

Masturbation has numerous benefits. So there’s so much more to it than just figuring yourself out. Solo play is a quick and easy way to make yourself feel good anytime you want.

Some masturbation benefits include de-stressing, mood boosts, pain relief, better sleep, etc. Women are even able to lessen their period cramps with this type of sex. Not to mention, masturbating with your partner is both sexy and fun.

Playing with yourself is safe for pregnant women as well. Some studies have even shown that regular masturbation can decrease the risk of prostate cancer.

So to reap all of these benefits, you should learn how to masturbate effectively.

Become a pro overnight

Most of the time, people think of masturbation as something that’s quick and boring. It doesn’t need to be that way at all. Sure, it can be quick if you don’t have time to experiment. On the other hand, you should give yourself time to explore your body thoroughly from time to time.

There are plenty of tricks you can try to get better at self-stimulation. Here are only some of them:

  • Setting up the mood
  • Playing/reading your favorite erotica
  • Experimenting with positions

Setting up the mood can include many things. This trick is designed to make you feel relaxed and in the mood for what’s about to come. So think of anything that makes you feel sexy. You can dress up in sexy clothes, play some music, decide if you want to do it in the dark or not.

During this time, you can consume pornography in any way that works for you. Doing it while masturbating is helpful for many people as well. Once you get into the mood, switching positions is what will make playtime exciting. There’s no need to just be on your back until it’s done. Do it sideways, doggy style, standing up, or however you like it!

If none of those things work wonders for you, we have a solution. Have you tried using sex toys? You definitely should, and here’s why.

Which toy works best for you

There are plenty of different kinds of toys for men and women. When it comes to what men can choose from, there are prostate massagers, cock rings, masturbators, such as eggs or fake vaginas, etc. On the other hand, women have a long list of options, including countless dildo and vibrator types.

However, what men and women have in common is anal play. This means that the universal sex toy everyone can use is a butt plug. It seems that women aren’t afraid to experiment with anal stimulation. They’re already used to one type of penetration, so why not try anal penetration as well?

Sadly, men aren’t as keen on trying things that have to do with butt play. Playing with anal sex toys has many benefits for them though. Not many men know that they too have a sweet spot (the P-spot), and it’s located in their anus. Stimulating this spot with anal plugs and other toys can lead to explosive orgasms.

We can only conclude that butt plugs are the best toy available at, which they designed for anyone. The pleasure they bring never disappoints. While you might not be sure what to do with them, we’ll remind you that there are different kinds of plugs, such as vibrating butt plugs, stainless steel and silicone toys, those with or without a flared base, etc. So you’ll definitely find something that suits your needs.

Anal masturbation

Now that cat’s out of the bag, let’s talk about anal masturbation. This kind of playtime should be something everyone should enjoy. However, you can’t just dive into it with no preparation.

Once you decide to try butt plugs, always start with the smallest one. Anal training is a thing, and you can even buy sets of plugs that will help you go from small to large.

What you can do with plugs is simply leave them in while you stimulate yourself in other ways. If you opt for anal beads, you can pull them out one by one. Vibrating plugs can have different patterns of vibrations that will also help satisfy you.

So what you need to do is choose the perfect kind of butt plug for you and experiment with it. Never forget to use plenty of lube because things can be painful otherwise.

Go solo first

Lastly, we’ll remind you that while having a partner is incredible, you’re capable of achieving things on your own as well. Yes, that goes for reaching orgasms too. If it’s not working so well for you, don’t worry. These things can take some time and practice to perfect, but know that you’re on the right track by simply trying.

Stimulating yourself with a sex toy always helps and has many benefits. One of those advantages is better sex with your partner whenever you decide to come back to it.

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